I recently had a conversation with a client, about what success is.  It caused me to realize that the definition of success means different things to different people. I looked up the definition of success in The Cambridge Dictionary and here is what I found:
successnoun [ C/U ]
US ​ /səkˈses/
​
the achieving of desired results, or someone or something that achieves positive results:

OK, but how do we measure this? Each individual needs to develop their own definition of success.  The client I was referring to has had a good deal of achievement academically and in her career but she does not feel successful.  Probing for why she does not feel successful I discovered she did not have a solid definition of success and did not believe in herself.

Alfred Adler, a contemporary of Freud, defined three life tasks we need to meet to be healthy and productive members of society.  1).  Work (can be unpaid) 2.) Community and 3.) Intimacy.  I believe if you are meeting all three of these life tasks not only are you probably healthy but are a productive member of society.  Does this define success?  I believe it does. Are you meeting all three of these life tasks?

If we all define success differently, how do you define it?  Do you have life goals you strive to meet?  If you meet them does this define success?  I believe it does.

Coach John Wooden defined success as: “Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to do your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.”

I like that definition of success!

Success is a state of mind.  If you believe and feel successful, have a positive attitude, are happy and content in life, and feel positively about yourself then this can also define success.

Perhaps you have some negative beliefs about yourself which are causing you to feel unsuccessful or incapable of achieving success.  Some examples are, “I am inadequate, I am damaged, I am not good enough”.  These examples of negative core beliefs are formed in childhood, most likely assumptions children come to believe about him or herself when being mistreated by a care giver or parent.  If you recognize these beliefs as a part of your core then this is the area you need to work on before you can feel successful.

Success comes from within ourselves.  We can’t measure success of ourselves in the eyes of others.  We need to feel positive about ourselves and not looking to others to judge us.  Success is not measured by the approval of others.

Setting goals for yourself and achieving them is a way to work towards your own success.  No matter how small the goal may be, when you meet it, this is success!

What is your definition of success?  If, in your life you are not feeling satisfaction for your accomplishments, or, that there are blocks to living the most satisfactory life, let’s talk.